Psychological trauma, such as lack of attention, lack of love given to the parents of the child, as well as other problems of a young child in the family are the main causes and roots of future psychological problems. If this person wants to understand the reasons why one or another psychological problem exists in his life, he will have to go back and to remember his difficult childhood.
Few can argue that his childhood was completely cloudless and happy. As a rule, most of us in a small child faced with a lack of attention . pay older, have experienced a lack of love and rejection of the very fact of its existence. All this inevitably contributed to the origin of those or other psychological trauma in children, which later resulted in specific psychological problems.
Man, being born, needs main things – unconditional love and infinite attention. Few people are born into extremely wealthy families. And few whose parents show unconditional love to their children. On the contrary, the prevailing part of the families (judging by the experience of Russia, it is about ninety percent of the total number according to unofficial statistics) – unsuccessful . The problems of a small child in such families are diverse: it can be single-parent families, Continue reading
Parents sometimes face the situation that they tell the child one thing and he does not hear and does the opposite. There is the anger and outrage. Let’s see what was the matter. Why the child “hear” what you say? It turns out the child perceives our phrase on its own.
In the childhood phrase-programs are easily digested, as the child’s mind control is lower than in adults. Any careless word perceived by children literally. Parents, often without realizing it, inform the child of the phrase with a hidden installation that is not benefiting them. Of course, this happens unconsciously, we are trying to help, but use the incorrect phrase.
Today we look at the often used phrase and determine how their child hears.
«do Not walk through puddles, catch a cold”, “the dog ” bite”, “Eat slowly, your stomach will be sore”, etc.
The child hears that the world is hostile. All, whatever he did, it is dangerous. That is, it is better to do nothing.
In the future it may become passive, afraid to make a step towards peace, it will be difficult to achieve success in business requires determination.
Say: “let’s Continue reading
This belief is the very consequence of the desire of parents to see that children achieved good results in everything he undertakes. We all want our children enjoy success and were pleased with myself.
However, we must understand that it is difficult to distinguish between approval and disapproval of what they do and who they are as individuals. In other words, praise the parents for some kind of achievement the child can receive as a sign of love. It is also possible the reverse situation. Disapproval, condemnation, the child may perceive as an attempt to cast him as a manifestation of the lack of love from parents. This trend first inherent in younger children.
Children desperately want to feel that parents love and accept them for what they are, regardless of victory or defeat they suffered at that moment. This important phenomenon is called ” unconditional love “. In short, unconditional love means that our children feel that we will never, under any circumstances, will not cease to love them. Can approve or not to take specific actions, the behavior of the child, but love for him should remain inviolable.
My patients this phenomenon Continue reading